who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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