A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
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