You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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