My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize