Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
