I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Randomize