Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
