I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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