she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
PANTIES FOUND
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