I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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