I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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