i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize