Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
