so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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