No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize