There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
