Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
