Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
