Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
you made out with another girl for some wings
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize
