Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Randomize
