I like to think it a success when the cops are called
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
