i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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