Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
