Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
