We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
