the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
there was a trapeze. enough said
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Success! We fucked roommates!
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