hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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