Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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