I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize
