Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Randomize
