The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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