i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
