I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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