Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Randomize