Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
