I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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