its not stalking. its research.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
