was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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