Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
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