had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Randomize
