We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Randomize
