So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
this must be what syphilis tastes like
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
