Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
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