thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
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