i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
vagina is talking i cant
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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