Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
false alarm, still single
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
