I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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