You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize