What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize