No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize